Two Months

Our second month without Henry came and went with some improvements but still mostly just sad about missing him and his life. We think and talk about him often and just miss him so much. We had the opportunity to meet with a great counselor who specializes in infant loss and we both left the appointment feeling happy that we went. It was hard reliving those 24 weeks but we were able to talk about some feelings that resulted from it, some thoughts on how others reacted to everything that happened and the choices that we made. I look at Henry's pictures everyday and think about him. Everywhere I go, it seems like there are people due on my due date for Henry. In my mom's group there are three people I know of due within a couple of days when Henry should have been born. Carl has several friends (and they are my friends too) that are due in December. Two mom's in Jack's tumbling class are due then. It just seems like everyone I see or talk to is having a baby in December and I am not. We are doing what we can to get through this and sometimes it is an hour, a day or a week at a time and very little time passes that we don't think of and miss our sweet boy, Henry. This has been a very hard year for us and I am looking forward to 2010 to try and start (somewhat) anew.